Well here I am again. The first time I wrote in here I was heartbroken. And as I am writing now I am once again heartbroken. Who would have thought I would end up here. This time though I have a lot more invested and a child to consider. I know that I will get through this. I don't know how or when but I know I will.
I cannot believe how long it's been since I've updated this thing. It feels good to be back. Don't know how long I'll continue this, but I've missed this. I don't even think most people are on this platform anymore. They probably are on facebook or something. I think I will start using livejournal again. I have a lot of things to say.
You know over and over again I think about it. Did I make the right decision when I married Ty? I just feel like I can't really ever trust him. Because in the back of my mind there's this doubt that if he lied about being married then he can lie about anything. I don't know what to do. Maybe he isn't the right person for me.
I don't know . . . I feel so blah. I haven't felt like that in a long time, but I find myself feeling like it now. Honestly I don't even know why I feel this way. Why now? Personally everything is fine. Hubby is treating me good. I have my own house. My family is doing fine. Yet I just feel so depressed and unhappy. I feel like I'm not fulfilling my purpose. I feel so lost in my ways and I don't know where to turn. I feel like I need to make some decisions where everything is concerned. It has got to get better. It just has to. Please tell me that it will. I don't have any faith in myself. I don't have much faith in the future.